Dear Lord Jesus, I thank You for this day, for i know that u are my Lord that as Created me with ur own image, i thank for the day i was BORN ..thank You for my being able to see, to hear and experience Your goodness everyday. I’m blessed because You are a forgiving , loving and an understanding God. Even though You have done so much for me but still You keep on blessing me. You sustain me with good health and you prosper me far beyond my imagination. I know I am forgiven for everything I have done, said or thought that was not pleasing to you because Jesus had took everything on that cross; there is no condemnation.

Help me to start this Day with a new attitude and plenty of gratitude. Let me make the best of each and every day; to still my mind so that I can hear from You. Lord, help me broaden my mind and faith that I can accept all things You have planned for me. Bless me with Your wisdom and knowledge that I can share for Your glory. Let me not whine and whimper over things I have no control over. Please keep me safe from all danger and harm.


Be with me Lord to give the best response when I’m pushed beyond my limits. I know that when I can’t pray, You listen to my heart. Continue to use me to do Your will. Continue to bless me that I may be a blessing to others. Keep me strong that I may help the weak.

Lord, I also thank you for your wonderful gift, my Family Cousin , my Friend Lynut and Esther that i have Feel ur Blessing From Them

Keep me uplifted that I may have words of encouragement for others. I pray for those that are lost and can’t find their way. I pray for those that are misjudged and misunderstood. I pray for those who don’t know You intimately. I pray for those that don’t believe that one day they will see you personally and believe.

I believe You change people and change things for good for those who love You. I pray for all my sisters and brothers. For each and every family member in their households. I pray for peace, unity, love and joy in their homes that they are out of debt and all their needs are met with abundance. I pray that every eye that reads this knows there is no problem, circumstance, or situation greater than You, Lord Jesus. Every battle is in Your hands for You to fight.


In Jesus name.
Amen!

Pathetic..

Now I am trying to erase everything about you
I will just take the good memories we had
Even if I hold onto you, I know you're going to leave
So I will accept our separation like it's nothing

I looked miserable, I was pathetic
Because I couldn't do anything
Yes, I won't ever find you again
Even if I miss you, even if I long for you, I will hold it in

* Don't ever look for me again- go to her
Because I'll meet someone else and be happy too
Because there isn't a spot for you to come back to
Don't ever find me again- don't find me, don't find me

Even if I'm alone on a street we used to walk on alot
Even if your favorite song is playing
Even if it rains and unknowingly, I think of you
Even if it's so hard and I cry, I will hold it in

Though I'm still blankly spending my days crying
Though it's awkward without you
Though I can't sleep with thoughts of you every night
I'm okay without you

It's over anyway, because this is it for us
Don't find me ever again, don't find me, don't find me

Lord, thank you for Your unfailing love, for a love that has comforted me when I have fallen short, when I've made mistakes, when everything has fallen apart. I've constantly taken my life into my hands and I have failed. Father, I don't want to stumble anymore, direct my footsteps according to Your word. Teach me to follow You. Give me understanding to discern Your ways from mine. Turn my eyes from worthless things that will only distract me from walking in your ways. My Father I have so many plans for my life, plans that only You know if they will succeed or not, so I surrender them to You. You know what I long for, what my heart hopes for; lead me, show me the way. I want to honor You with my decisions, with my plans, with my life. Amen.

Go Away!

i like to see the rain.. coz it make me peace deep inside my heart, 

but the true is something happen inside me while see the rain fall down

somthing can't say with words.. i feel peace but want to cry..

few month ago something happen and until now i don't

know am i strong enough to stand again...

i cry to many night

i have too much pain.. no one will understand..

yes im smiling,  even laugh..  coz it was the easy way

then to tell Ppl why am i crying... 

and to many night i was asking God why it happen to me??

why??? me?? admit that i was in Love with HIM... 

and until now i can't get over HIM!!

i miss u... missu so damm much!!

and i was praying every single nite ask god to bless u and ur Girlfriend..

and i was asking wif my self why u come in to my life  if the is the way u 

left me?.. u said that u don't love ur ex anymore... then why u go back with her??

and u said to me that u will wait for me until God make us one..

but then where is ur promise???

i have trust u more than u ever know.. no one will understand the feeling is :'( 

just hate this feeling ... 

Why i cry?

You’re the reason why I cry

The way I'm feeling

It's quite hard to describe

I feel so alone and lost

In this unbearable life

Too many twisted emotions

My stomach all tied in knots

Wish there was something I could do

To completely erase all these thoughts

How long must I feel this pain

I've cryed so many tears

I can't stand looking in your eyes

Only to see all of my fears

How can you believe the smile on my face

When you can clearly see the pain in my eyes

Take a step back and look deeper

You're the reason why I cry

Heavenly Father, thank you for seeing in me what I cannot. I struggle with accepting the fact that I am worthy. Worthy of a godly man, a godly relationship, of your love. I desire all the best but always aim and settle for less. Your word says I'm worth more than rubies, I'm chosen, royalty; yet I feel ordinary, simple, insignificant. I want to see myself through Your eyes; through the eyes of my Maker, my Father, my Savior. I want to believe I'm worth it.

Dear Lord. I'm not at peace with myself. I always feel like I'm not good enough, like I'm not worthy of the best. I'm to focused on my failures,my imperfections,my insecurities. I try to think positive and concentrate on all the wonderful things you have planned but the cynical part of me always drowns out the good. My Father you know that in the past I've been hurt and torn down by words. I don't want to live my life believing that I don't matter, that I'm not valuable. My Father God I know you treasure me, that to You I'm far more precious than jewels. But why is the bad stuff so much easier to believe? Sweet Lord, please help me conquer my insecurities and help restore my self esteem. Amen

That’s it I have enough to trying to make this right
When it’s my hatred of you that gives me my life
So I will say my prayers before I go to sleep
And you can be sure you won’t be in my dream

Now if you look at the clock you’ll see the time has run out
You was full of confusion and I was full of doubt
But it’s all over now so go and ask god for break
For I’m not going until you’ve took all you can take

You were planning a future while I was going mad
This is beyond stupid this is beyond bad
We were barely able to talk about our pasts
So almost without you knowing it was over so fast

There are hearts that are sweeter than the one you gave
Hearts that would be satisfied by the heart I made
So take your words that are worthless and leave
Because when you are here I cannot breathe

You know that you will be one of my cherished lovers
But don’t be naive and think there were no others
I have lost my mind and I have lost my pity
As you didn’t have anything left to give to me

Thank you for the daily pain and nightly agony
Thank you for everything you never did for me
Thank you for hurting me so that I would Forget you
Thank you for all the poor quality memories
Thank you for the little bittersweet brutalities
Thank you for hurting me so that I would Forget you.. 

Thank You for Hurting me..

Even though my eyes and emotions are sitll hateful,
I've got appreciation and I'm actually rather grateful,
That you hurt me, crushed me, cast me aside from your hand,
Because by doing that - you gave me strength to stand.

If I was still being dragged along, hanging by a thread,
My body would be so messed up never mind inside my head.
My heart no longer cries for you - it hasn't for a while,
It belongs to someone better, someone who makes me smile.

So thankyou for breaking up my heart,
Because of that you've given me the very best start.
And thanks for never giving a damn,
Or I wouldn't have ended up where I am.

cRying..

I'm stand still
wondering
why my heart feel uncomfortable?


Like ocean it's being ripple inside
Wave take away the sand and
Bring it back again over and over
when the tide getting ebb, some is taken away


Longing
Is this it?


I take it in my heart with 1000 joy
hope it soar and light the sky
But suddenly winter fairy reach inside
My world become frozen


Speechless...
Something steal my tongue
Left me by my own


I close my eyes and I feel it
The arm of sadness embracing me around
Like blanket of ice
it is freeze my tears


Why it did not let me cry?
When tears is helper for reducing pain
When emotion in jeopardy to turn into beast inside
I need it more than anything else


Please God, allow me to cry.
I'm afraid of myself when I couldn't cry.

SMILE tO HiDe The PaIn

“You look at me and think,

‘she’s so happy’ but there’s 

so much behind this little 

smile that you will never know.”

"Just because her eyes don’t tear
Doesn’t mean her heart doesn’t cry;
And just because she comes off strong
Doesn’t mean there’s nothing wrong.”


“You never see my tears, 

but that doesn't mean I don't cry. 

You never feel my pain, 

but that doesn't mean I don't hurt. 

You only see me smile, 

and that doesn't 

mean that I am happy.”

“It was just one of 

those days when you 

can walk around fooling 

everyone into thinking you're 

happy and look back and 

notice that every time you 

smile or laugh there is a little

pang of hurt in your heart 

because you know you 

are lying to the people who 

mean the most to you.”

thank you for the PAIN

For all the times,
You weren't by my side,
For all the times,
You just watched me cry.

Everything you put me through,
Hurts me so bad now,
And the pain wont fade away,
So now I have to live with it every day.

I cant believe you would do this,
After you told me you loved me,
And I thought it was true,
But I guess you lied.

Now I'm here alone,
Without you by my side,
No one for me to talk to,
About what I'm going through.

I can force a smile doesn’t mean I'm happy

I can’t stand it when people ask me what’s wrong....cause in life...something is ALWAYS wrong. It’s like there's no need to ask anymore. But somehow...my friends just keep on asking. I guess that is a sign that they really do care about me...it just doesn't seem like it right now.

Do you think its easy being me? Do you think its easy putting on the act that I do everyday? I smile when all I want to do is cry... I laugh when all I want to do is die.. I want to tell everyone how my world falls apart each night when I am laying in bed with tears in my eyes, pleading with god to help me. I want to let everyone know what it is like to be me, pretending to be happy... pretending to like myself, If it was up to me, I wouldn't be pretending, I would actually be happy... Too bad its not.

Sometimes I feel like nobody has held me down and forced me to cry, or made me hug them, or seen the inside of me. I just say "Oh I'm fine" and walk away. Nobody's ever said to me "No, you're not”

When you asked me what was wrong I said “nothing”……. After you left I whispered everything.

If you look inside a girls heart, you'd see how much she really cries. You'll find secrets hidden, best friends and lies, but what you'll see the most is how hard it is to stay strong when nothings right and everything is wrong.

This isn't a perfect world, people get hurt. You smile when you feel like crying, you act like you're okay when you're falling apart, but you got to let go and move on...because there's nothing else you can do.

Just because I can force a smile doesn’t mean I'm happy, and just because I can fake a laugh doesn’t mean I'm okay


A strong girl keeps her shit in line, and with tears running down her face, she still manages to whisper the simple words "I'm Fine."

this is where the hurting starts & the nightmare begins.

the girl who always looks sad but claims she’s fine.
the girl who puts sad away messages up everyday.
the girl who when she sees you, smiles a half a smile.
the girl who always has time to listen to you vent and is willing to give her opinion to help you in anyway that she can.
the girl who cares about helping everyone but herself.
the girl who cries every night before she goes to sleep.
the girl who pretends that she’s okay while she's dying inside.
the girl who says she’s happy for you when you get a new girlfriend while jealousy is raging inside her.
the girl who hugs you when you’re down but secretly wishes she could hug you forever.
the girl who tries to look beautiful even though she knows she’s not.
the girl who says that she’ll always be there for you & means it.
that’s me that is the story of my life

HERO???

You hurt my feelings when you come to me and don’t even say a word To me
You don’t even ask me how I am
You treat me like I don’t exist
I am not a doll.. I am a human being with feelings
You avoid me all the time ..
You simply go on playing games with people’s feelings
Is it too much for me to ask you to care for me and show your respect And love to me?
What did I do to you to deserve this kind of treatment from you?
I can’t go on living my life pretending that everything is fine between us Because we do have a problem
Can I have a moment alone with you?
We need to talk
You haven’t been fair with me
Why are you so angry with me?
You can’t change me; neither I can change you
When are you going to learn to respect me and accept me for what I Am?
Lets talk and not waste time because time is very important to me
Life must go on
We can’t run away from problems because they go with you wherever You are
I can’t be perfect, so why do you think you can?
Nothing in life is perfect, not even people
I feel alone living in a strange world
I been neglected by you for so long
We can’t live in fantasies because life is not a fantasy, life is real
Why do you get your anger and frustration out on me?
I don’t know what I have to do with your anger and frustration because It is unfair to take your anger and frustration out on me
Why don’t you be my friend for once if you tried?
What makes you think that I am no good?
Do I have to be perfect for you to like me and love me?
You only think about yourself and nobody else because you only care About yours
I need someone that I can count on
I need someone to cry on his or her shoulders who understands the Way I feel
You make me look small around others
I am a human being and I have needs also
I can’t force you to love me but this is up to you to decide if you want to
You treat me like a piece of dirt under you feet
I hope that is not going to be too late for you to understand that you Been unkind to me for such a long time
I want to live in peace with you and myself for once
We can’t go on ignoring each other much longer because you hurt me All the time
Please don’t put me down because of my disability

time to let go and Move On

I don't see the smile you used to give to me
I don't see the same look in your eyes
I don't know why it's happening to us
I'm losing you forever so fast

It's hard to keep the pieces of a broken heart
There's no mending, there's no brand new start
maybe I just have to face the truth
I'm losing you and there's nothing I can do

Tomorrow is a lonely day that I must face
To try and get back on my feet would be a waste
For how can I truly live without your love
A life without you is not a life at all

There are many questions
Left in my mind
I can't find the answers
Why oh why
But I know it is true, it is time to let go

maybe It's the time to let go, it's time to move on
It is the time to forget what we have shared
I just have to learn gettin' over all the days
We used to say...
I Love You

Im Sorry Coz I Love u MOre Then Everything.. im soRRy for everything that i've done that Hurt U im sorry coz i can't make u happy Like she did.. im sorry for everything.. it owedy A month has passed.. 1 day without you  is like a hell for me..

IF YOU...

If you have been holding on to many unnecessary people, let them fools go.

If you have been clinging on to some old memories for too long, let the past go.

If you have been holding on to a bad partner hoping that they will change some day, let their go.

If you have been haunted and bound by past mistakes, it’s time to let them go.

If you have been holding on to hate, regret or old grudges, let that drama go.

If you have been afraid and stopping yourself from being who you truly are for too long, let all that self-doubt go.

If you have been insecure of your abilities and afraid to take risks for too long, let go of the loser mentality.

It’s time to let it all go and prepare your soul for a new life that is waiting for you in 2012